Wednesday, April 01, 2009
Extreme Engineering!
No, it's not a new reality show - but perhaps it should be.
Imagine it - Extreme Engineering!, where contestants representing local government organisations compete to over-engineer even the simplest of structures.
On our left, the first entrant - Rodney District Council, with its entry: "Parakai Entrance Road Signage".
Seriously folks, what were they thinking?
Parakai now has two 'lovely' (and I use the term loosely) "Welcome to Parakai - Please Slow Down" signs at its Southern entrance. In itself, that's not a bad idea. But these signs took a team of workers more than a week to put up - and the work isn't finished yet.
Because of the fall-off either side of the road, they build gigantic retaining walls butting out each side of the tarmac, filled with earth. On the footpath side, this then meant a drain had to be piped, and the footpath realigned around the retaining wall. Then, six enormous wooden poles, three per sign, were installed in the dirt-filled retaining walls. Now, each pole on its own is hefty enough to support the weight of a small fishing vessel, and stout enough to deflect a minor meteor strike. And there are three per flimsy sign!
As I say, this involved a whole team of workers, plus heavy machinery, for at least a week (not to mention, I am sure, visits by engineers, planners, architects etc, plus all the attendant office work). Then, over the past couple of days, more workers have turned up to paint the road red between the two signs. No doubt more workers will turn up soon to plant the bare earth under the signs - at least they had better, or else!
That's the one bright light in the whole affair - it would appear we are to get some gardens at last. For a long time I have bitched about our ugly red tar seal roundabout at the end of SH16, while every other area in the district gets nice planted ones - so it's nice to see our extreme signage is to be planted beneath. Nice bright flowers would be both welcome and welcoming, though we'll more likely get miniature flaxes (nicely sculptural and still attractive) or, worse, boring old coprosma (but even the ugliest plant is still vastly preferable to concrete!)
What have these signs cost the ratepayer?
Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those whingers who moans everytime the council spends a cent on anything other than sewerage, water supply or roads. On the contrary, I love seeing local body beautification, and money spent on 'non essential' things like parks, libraries, etc. Those are the things that make a place liveable, rather than just somewhere to exist. But when spending those rates dollars, there needs to be a justifiable reason for the expenditure, value for money and an easily perceived benefit resulting from the expense.
Were these signs really the best thing the council could spend it's cash on?
I'll be honest - the structures don't look too bad. Once gardens are growing beneath them, they should look moderately attractive. But they just seem such overkill, and really rather unnecessary. We had 50 km/h signs there before - what was wrong with those? If motorists won't slow for a 50km/h sign, are they more likely to do so for a sign supported by three mammoth kauri trunks?
And did they have to use those ugly, standard blue road signs on them? When I saw the poles going up, I had a brief hope Parakai was going to get some form of really attractive entrance way - maybe some nice Maori carving, or painted signs welcoming visitors. They could have still had the "slow down" message. I'm sure motorists aren't too stupid to misunderstand something like that, just because it's in a slightly different form to usual - in fact, they would probably be more likely to notice them if they were something special.
What we got, of course, is an adaptation of a standard design. Nothing special for Parakai, as usual. I presume these massively-supported signs are going to be a fixture around the district; I see they have gone in at one end of Waitoki already - though they make more sense there, as they didn't require all the retaining work, drain filling and path realignment - just bang in the poles and put up the signs.
So, what's the next entry for Extreme Engineering? Send in your suggestions ...
Imagine it - Extreme Engineering!, where contestants representing local government organisations compete to over-engineer even the simplest of structures.
On our left, the first entrant - Rodney District Council, with its entry: "Parakai Entrance Road Signage".
Seriously folks, what were they thinking?
Parakai now has two 'lovely' (and I use the term loosely) "Welcome to Parakai - Please Slow Down" signs at its Southern entrance. In itself, that's not a bad idea. But these signs took a team of workers more than a week to put up - and the work isn't finished yet.
Because of the fall-off either side of the road, they build gigantic retaining walls butting out each side of the tarmac, filled with earth. On the footpath side, this then meant a drain had to be piped, and the footpath realigned around the retaining wall. Then, six enormous wooden poles, three per sign, were installed in the dirt-filled retaining walls. Now, each pole on its own is hefty enough to support the weight of a small fishing vessel, and stout enough to deflect a minor meteor strike. And there are three per flimsy sign!
As I say, this involved a whole team of workers, plus heavy machinery, for at least a week (not to mention, I am sure, visits by engineers, planners, architects etc, plus all the attendant office work). Then, over the past couple of days, more workers have turned up to paint the road red between the two signs. No doubt more workers will turn up soon to plant the bare earth under the signs - at least they had better, or else!
That's the one bright light in the whole affair - it would appear we are to get some gardens at last. For a long time I have bitched about our ugly red tar seal roundabout at the end of SH16, while every other area in the district gets nice planted ones - so it's nice to see our extreme signage is to be planted beneath. Nice bright flowers would be both welcome and welcoming, though we'll more likely get miniature flaxes (nicely sculptural and still attractive) or, worse, boring old coprosma (but even the ugliest plant is still vastly preferable to concrete!)
What have these signs cost the ratepayer?
Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those whingers who moans everytime the council spends a cent on anything other than sewerage, water supply or roads. On the contrary, I love seeing local body beautification, and money spent on 'non essential' things like parks, libraries, etc. Those are the things that make a place liveable, rather than just somewhere to exist. But when spending those rates dollars, there needs to be a justifiable reason for the expenditure, value for money and an easily perceived benefit resulting from the expense.
Were these signs really the best thing the council could spend it's cash on?
I'll be honest - the structures don't look too bad. Once gardens are growing beneath them, they should look moderately attractive. But they just seem such overkill, and really rather unnecessary. We had 50 km/h signs there before - what was wrong with those? If motorists won't slow for a 50km/h sign, are they more likely to do so for a sign supported by three mammoth kauri trunks?
And did they have to use those ugly, standard blue road signs on them? When I saw the poles going up, I had a brief hope Parakai was going to get some form of really attractive entrance way - maybe some nice Maori carving, or painted signs welcoming visitors. They could have still had the "slow down" message. I'm sure motorists aren't too stupid to misunderstand something like that, just because it's in a slightly different form to usual - in fact, they would probably be more likely to notice them if they were something special.
What we got, of course, is an adaptation of a standard design. Nothing special for Parakai, as usual. I presume these massively-supported signs are going to be a fixture around the district; I see they have gone in at one end of Waitoki already - though they make more sense there, as they didn't require all the retaining work, drain filling and path realignment - just bang in the poles and put up the signs.
So, what's the next entry for Extreme Engineering? Send in your suggestions ...
